After the Secret
Sep. 28th, 2025 12:03 am![[syndicated profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/feed.png){kind=small}
post_secret_feedHi Frank,
In 2012 when I was 16 years old, I was date-raped by my then boyfriend at a party. A story not altogether dissimilar to the secret you posted this week from a person who was assaulted by a friend and was considering suicide. It took me 2 years to realize what had happened to me and what that meant, despite it being painful and causing bleeding for weeks. My brain had hidden the memory deep inside to protect me.
In my secret I wrote to you in 2015 I said that I was mad at myself for taking so long to figure it out and that I couldn’t forgive myself. I was considering suicide and felt too much shame to tell anyone about what had happened to me. I felt weak and that I had let myself down. But I was lucky enough to find a supportive community and was eventually able to talk to a therapist about my experience. It took time and a lot of work to overcome the crippling PTSD I didn’t realize I was struggling with. But I DID make it!
These days, I don’t think about it and if I do, it no longer has any power over me. I have forgiven myself and now I have a wonderful partner who respects me and never makes me feel unsafe. Moving on wasn’t easy but it is SO worth it. EMDR saved my life and allowed me to see that I was in fact strong and that life was worth living.
I guess I just wanted them to know that they are not alone. Unfortunately 1 in 5 women and 1 in 16 men in the US will experience sexual assault in their lifetimes. But, IT DOES GET BETTER! This is not your fault and that person was never really a friend at all. You deserve to be safe and loved. You are not tainted or ruined, you are so incredibly strong. I hope you are able to find the help you need and are able to give yourself grace. We are not victims, we are survivors.
Much love from one survivor to another,
J.
PS: If I submitted a secret today it would probably say something like, “I am not my past. I change everyday and I can’t wait to see who I become.”
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In which there is a 60-day novel challenge
Sep. 24th, 2025 06:33 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ganimedeThe info says, "Every Monday, we’ll drop a video going over what you need to know to complete that week’s exercises, then we’ll come together live every Thursday to discuss the work, answer questions, and keep each other motivated. Plus, in November, we'll have daily writing sprints, Monday through Friday. Many of the sprints will be co-hosted by best-selling authors and experts in the writing community!"
In addition, they're offering a free trial with all the site's Premium features for the length of the challenge. On the 1st October, if you sign up for a free trial on the Dabble website, there will be a pop-up inviting you to join the 60-Day Novel Challenge. They also have a (free) challenge template which has exercises and resources included.
I used Dabble one year to do NaNo and I did manage to write 50k words that year so it was quite good. I'm currently in the middle of a novel and I don't really want to take a month off for planning something that I've already been writing! Otherwise, I would certainly be giving it a try.
September is Suicide Prevention Month
Sep. 21st, 2025 12:12 ampost_secret_feedA scene from ‘PostSecret: The Show’.
Suicide is America’s secret. We keep it from ourselves, but not talking about it only makes it worse.
Suicide is the most preventable form of death in this country. We know what we can do to save lives. We know what works.
By lifting the stigma surrounding mental illness and attacking the stereotypes about suicide that can prevent young people from reaching out for help when they need it – that can save lives.
By sharing our feelings about anxiety, depression, and loneliness before those secrets wall us up – that can save lives too.
67% of students tell a friend if they are thinking about suicide rather than a parent, teacher, or counselor.
That sounds like a lot of pressure if you are that friend, but it’s really not. It just means doing the little things. Asking questions, listening without judgement, validating their feelings, and referring them to a professional.
You don’t need to be a trained professional to help a friend – you just need to be a good friend.
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